How to Let Go Of Old Stories From Your Past
One of my favourite websites, Tiny Buddha, have published my article, If Your Life Story Depresses You or Holds You Back, Change It and the response has been overwhelming. The comments that are coming in under the post are very thought provoking and make me especially grateful that I’ve been able to move on and let go of old stories from my past.
Even some of my closest friends would be surprised to learn that my father deserted me as a baby. Or that I was emotionally and physically abused by my ex boyfriend. I don’t hide these facts out of shame or deep inner pain. I simply don’t tell these stories because I’ve moved on from them. They don’t define who I am.
Sometimes I hear people blaming their parents for screwing them up. Or an ex for making them unable to fully trust anyone again. Or – insert any story that involves blaming someone or something from the past for their present life.
They tell this story to themselves and to others so often that it becomes their truth.
If I’ve ever felt hung up on an emotion and gone into blaming (or self-shaming) mode, an alternative therapy or resource has landed in my lap just when I’ve needed it.
I was offered an emotional acupuncture session after the painful breakup with my abusive ex and after just one session, I was magically released of it. I could see it as something that happened in my past which I learned from, but I no longer felt any strong negative emotions around it. Imagine how much money I could have spent on therapy without the same result?
A friend loaned me a copy of Byron Katie’s wonderful book, ‘Loving What Is’ and by doing the written exercise in the beginning of the book – my relationship with my mother was healed. Just like that, I was able to reframe it and let go of the blame. Incredible and true.
A few months ago I was duped by a business coach who took a lot of money from me, didn’t deliver what she’d promised and ignored repeated requests for a refund. It badly affected my emotions and I found myself re-telling the story of what happened and what a ***** this woman is until I finally decided one day that I needed to let it go. I could feel the negative energy rising every time I told the story. It was affecting my sleep and holding me back in my business.
A women in my business mastermind group is an EAM (Energy Alignment Method) practitioner and she offered me an online session. Again, in under an hour I released the bitterness and injustice. I can now see the face of this business coach in sponsored posts in my social media feeds and I feel… indifferent. (I also did a written exercise to list the good that came out of that experience and what I learned from it, which I found really helpful.)
I’ve also used EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) and Transformation Breath Therapy. I guess I simply refuse to let the actions of others affect my happiness!
Begin to pay attention to when you’re telling repeated stories about someone who’s wronged you. Your thoughts create your reality and the more fuel you give to the story, the more it takes over your life, creating negative energy that blocks you from fully receiving all of the good stuff you deserve.
I invite you to read my Tiny Buddha article here and to share it with anyone else who could use some help to let go of old stories from the past.
Lori Deschene, the creator of Tiny Buddha wrote to me personally to say how in alignment my article is with a new course she’s running called Recreate Your Life Story, all about how to let go of old stories from your past so you can free yourself to be happy in the present.
In the comments below, I’d love to hear what you think. Has this resonated with you? Are you ready to let go of stories from your past? Has this landed in your lap for a reason today?
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Thank you so much for sharing, this is inspiring!
Thanks so much Rocio. xx
I’m one of those who found you via your story on Tiny Buddha and I want to say a huge thanks for sharing with such vulnerability and authenticity. I am going to pay more attention to when I am being dramatic and telling a story I really don’t need to be telling, including stories I tell myself. I am also going to look at some of the resources you have mentioned here. Emotional acupuncture sounds really interesting. Thank you!
Thank you Mel – and welcome to Project Me! This is wonderful to hear. I don’t know where you live but I have linked to my emotional acupuncturist in the post and she’s based in London. xx
Thanks for sharing these difficult stories, Kelly. What I see now is the real you and how you have decided to define yourself, not the scars from these past events. So important to show others that they are not alone, and that they can forge a new path. Inspiring!
Thanks so much Leanne, that means so much to me. Sending love! xx